A Guide to Watersports

November 23, 2015

Everyone has a fetish that turns them on, whether it would be role-playing, feet, BDSM – that’s mine! – we all have a kink that makes our dicks hard and our pussies wet. Normally, urophilia is classified under BDSM, but not everyone wants to wear a piss gag and be forced to drink someone else’s urine. Still, a lot of people enjoy nothing more than a little sprinkle on their companion’s soft skin.

This may sound obvious to you but I’m going to say it anyway because everyone should always be aware of it. Sex is a two-way street, if you’re the only one who is getting pleasure out of it, you’re just using your partner’s body to masturbate. Therefore, you should discuss with your partner what you want to do and talk about what each other’s boundaries are too. Make sure that you’re both comfortable about the thought of getting urinated on so you won’t experience the awkward post-coital silence after sex.

Being clean before getting dirty

Think about your water sports session as if you’re preparing for your holiday abroad. You’ve booked your tickets and everything has been confirmed, you’ve made a reservation at a swanky hotel and all that you have to do now is to pack your suitcase. If you’re a power-lifter, bodybuilder, or just an average gym junkie, you’ll have a hard time dealing with your diet. It is advised to avoid any food that contains protein such as meat, fish, eggs, along with caffeine products that make your pee taste nasty. A great dietary alternative would be to do a vegan diet for a week or two, where you would stock up on pineapple, strawberries, oranges and bananas and still eat vegetables that have a mild/moderate amount of protein like lentils, peas, broccoli, basically anything that’s green and organic – for those who still want to keep their gains. To boost the flavour of your pee, you can drink some fruit juice 40-45 minutes prior to your session. It will make it easier for your partner to swallow your yellow load.

Speaking of swallowing, you have to be aware of the possible risk of passing on an infection to your partner. Therefore, you should make sure that you have a healthy bladder and your pee isn’t contaminated with any bad bacteria such as E.Coli, which is the main cause of urinary tract infections (UTI). In worse cases, you could pass on Hepatitis B, so it’s seen as sensible and respectable towards your companion when you go and get yourself checked beforehand.

Somewhere hot, steamy and wet!

When the safety measures are checked off the list, you can move on to more exciting stuff! If this is your first time performing water sports, it’s best for you to start off slowly. Begin by peeing in the shower with your partner, where he or she would feel comfortable because she can get herself clean. In my opinion, if you’re going to do water sports, the best place to do it would be in the shower. Have you ever watched that episode on ‘Girls’ in season 1, where Adam joined Hannah in the shower and started to pee on her? He stated that there wasn’t any point in her getting out of the shower when there was still piss on her. It’s not as if you’ll be scarred for life when you get peed on. Yes, it is a form of bodily waste but that waste can easily be washed away! Furthermore, the bathroom holds the perfect heat to do some sprinkling action, a room temperature between 26-28 degrees won’t make you feel like you’re pissing in the blistering cold winds of England!
Drinking from the fountain of youth…or fountain of Venus?

Whoever said that they’ve never watched porn when they were in their teens is a liar. We’ve all had that curious moment to see what eccentric stuff two people have done together in the name of love…or in this case, sex. I remember watching a few porn videos when I was younger and came across a couple of clips under the name ‘piss sluts’. Being the open-minded person I am, I wasn’t too grossed out by the actions performed in the videos, but perplexed at the thought of ‘how is that even possible?’ Whilst making a comparison between ordinary sex videos and water sports clips, I’ve noticed that the guys who were peeing didn’t do any vigorous positions beforehand, that’s because they don’t want to get too dehydrated to the point where they’ll open the tap and nothing comes out. Another piece of advice to note down is to drink a lot of water an hour prior to your session, you may find that your pee will come out clear rather than yellow. As a matter of fact, the lighter your pee is, the more hydrated you are, so you won’t feel too thirsty once you’ve peed out the entire content from your bladder!

There were also a lot of different positions the porn stars made that made me tilt my head and make me go ‘huh?’. Some of the most popular positions you should try out are the ‘Cataracts of the Nile’ where the guy would straddle his partner and pee all over her chest and stomach. The ‘Watering the Oak Tree’ is where the sexy lady would squat over you and opens her legs wide where you get to experience the sensation of her sprinkling over your torso. ‘The Fountain of Venus’ is where your companion will lie on her back and the guy would kneel in front of her cunt and spray onto your face. This can normally be achieved when she’s cumming from oral sex. Last but certainly not least, there is the iconic ‘Golden Shower’ where you would stand tall and proud as you open up your bladder to give your partner a wash that will make her feel, well, golden!

Whatever floats your boat!

If any of you guys read my previous articles, no. I haven’t got any experience in this kind of sport. Well…there was one little incident where I was getting fingered by a previous partner and I involuntarily peed on the guy’s hand the same time I was climaxing, which resulted with a damp patch on the bed. New studies suggest that a female’s cum or squirt is mostly made up of urine, so technically, you’ve already participated in water sports without even realising it!

If you happen to be a punter who is desiring to give an escort a golden shower or vice versa, you should take extra precautions with your health to avoid the spread of infection. A courtesan wouldn’t appreciate catching something that could stall her business, and you certainly wouldn’t appreciate receiving an infection that could make you feel like you’re pissing razor blades on your next trip to the toilet. Like any personal meeting with an escort, tell her what gets your dick throbbing and drooling with pre-cum. Some guys like to just urinate on ladies whereas others would prefer to see them swallow it, so it’s good to clarify to your acquaintance what your specific interests are.

Don’t forget, there is nothing wrong with you having this kind of fetish, or any other fetish as a matter of fact. To anyone who is already has a judgement towards this kink, I will reference a quote which I’m sure many of you have heard of before – ‘Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it!’

Zoe Jaspers
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I am not sure man. There is nothing better than good old BJ.

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