SEX

The world of sex toys is a fast paced world, where one month a vibrating silicone foot is the perfect sex toy, only to become outdated the next month by the latest innovation.

An ex-teacher in Florida has been jailed for a whopping 22 years after she had sex with three of her underage students.

A terrified family in family in Tredegar, South Wales has called in the Ghostbusters amid claims that they have been molested by an evil poltergeist for months.

I have to admit it, when I saw the ‘alleged’ Danish sex education book which went into rather graphic detail about how children were made this week, I thought it was a wind up. Maybe it the torrent of fake stories given to us by social media, or allegations of photo’s being taken down because they ‘offend Muslims’, when in fact no such thing has happened, I have just become rather sceptical in my old age.

If you ask the average person on the street how porn can change you, they will tell you the same old story that we always here: “porn gives you unrealistic expectations of sex” and that “porn corrupts”.

We have all had that one funny teacher we remember from when we were at school. Whist the others were rather strict and boring, these individuals would joke with you and speak to you like you were actually an adult. Despite there being a possibility that they would be treated with scepticism by fellow teachers, they really did make you enjoy going to school. However, one teacher in America is in serious trouble after maybe taking it all a step too far.

British tourists are famous for a whole bunch of things, but nothing quite as much as our ability to get pissed, loud and completely naked in public. We’ve gone from the prodigious days of having our own empire covering the entire world to getting our penises and tits out any opportunity we get. We feel that our ancestors would be proud – to see that we’re so arrogantly English, that we just don’t care anymore.

Throughout the chronicles of history there has been bribery in one form or another – from a well-endowed goat, gifted to the local aristocracy, to a small bag of gold tightly bound by a ribbon. Our society, however, is far more progressive. We’re gone past these unnecessary gifts of materialism to the good-old fashioned offering of actual flesh and blood.

From the Greeks to the Ottomans, and then again onto the modern day Americans, there has been one accepted principle when it comes to attraction: people in positions of authority are hot. Without getting into a discussion about a patriarchal society, this is typically more commonly seen amongst young women, with that Hollywood style beady-eyed look as they stare at their adult superiors.

Out of all the things you could punish a woman for, few guys would think of making sex noises. To some, a woman’s fanatic sex screams are just an awesome boost to the male ego – the idea that you’re able to inspire such auspicious testimonies with just your penis. But even for those that aren’t exactly turned on by loud women in the bedroom, few would ever condemn it.