FUN

I have to admit it, when I saw the ‘alleged’ Danish sex education book which went into rather graphic detail about how children were made this week, I thought it was a wind up. Maybe it the torrent of fake stories given to us by social media, or allegations of photo’s being taken down because they ‘offend Muslims’, when in fact no such thing has happened, I have just become rather sceptical in my old age.

Too often man has sullied nature with his penis. There’s barely a park these days that hasn’t had a secretive blowjob or two occurred in it, leaving some poor unsuspecting planet or tree with a splattering of a clouded substance. Even for youngsters, the first condom they see is rarely within a sexual education class, but a used, wrinkled looking balloon lying discarded on the pavement.

British tourists are famous for a whole bunch of things, but nothing quite as much as our ability to get pissed, loud and completely naked in public. We’ve gone from the prodigious days of having our own empire covering the entire world to getting our penises and tits out any opportunity we get. We feel that our ancestors would be proud – to see that we’re so arrogantly English, that we just don’t care anymore.

From the Greeks to the Ottomans, and then again onto the modern day Americans, there has been one accepted principle when it comes to attraction: people in positions of authority are hot. Without getting into a discussion about a patriarchal society, this is typically more commonly seen amongst young women, with that Hollywood style beady-eyed look as they stare at their adult superiors.

Sex toys are everywhere. It is hard to escape them, and if you have ever used one in the bedroom you will know why. Not only are they great for a little solo fun, but they can make sex even better and have your partner begging you for more.

The idea of joining the mile high club is one that many like the sound of. It is a common sexual fantasy, and many put it second only to the idea of having a threesome. What is it that makes sex on a plane so appealing, and how can you join the mile high club?

One of the great questions in life throughout history has been ‘what do women actually want?’. Well, to be fair, when it comes to life and love, no-one has really worked that one out. It could be argued that women don’t even know themselves. However, there is one area where we can figure out what their tastes are, and that is in porn viewing.

Everyone is always looking for a new and exciting sex position to try, but scanning through the pages of the Kama Sutra takes a long time, and honestly, we don’t know how they get into half of those positions without breaking limbs first.

An Illinois man is defending his decision to have a two way mirror in the women’s bathroom of his bar, saying it was a ‘fun house gag’.

There can be fewer bigger douchebags in the world than Kanye West. The guy walks around like he owns the world. Yes, he has loads of money and his wife, Kim Kardashian is absolutely stunning, but my God, there is no need to be such a prick about it.